Welcome
Marieke van Donkersgoed ~Doula~
for
the terminally ill, the dying, and those who love them
About Marieke van Donkersgoed and End-of-Life Care
How can I help?
The journey with potentially terminal illness is difficult. Everything changes from the first moment of diagnosis. It can stir up all facets of your life: emotionally, mentally, spiritually, socially and even practically. There is so much to take in and understand. It can be overwhelming for you and your loved ones to keep it all straight and you may feel lonely and fearful about the future. .
As a certified Doula (Greek for servant) I am trained to walk the journey with you and to be a constant and reliable advocate and resource moving forward. I can be helpful in many ways as I have walked this journey many times with many wonderful people.
I will support you while navigating your course through medical information and appointments, and when making difficult choices about timing and treatments. I will be available to you, and advocate for your wishes and values. I will help you navigate the complex medical system and assist you when difficult conversations need to be had with your medical professionals and health care workers.
I can be at the bedside when needed.
Precious Time
Precious time is when you are very sick and death is likely, if not imminent. It is when you say what you need to say, and say what you need.
Precious time is when you do important things that must be completed, and gather around you what is most meaningful.
Precious time is when the quality of life is more important than the number of days remaining. You may be in precious time yourself, or perhaps caring for someone you love. This is a distinct type of time, when being alive becomes more important than it ever was before.
Openness to the reality of death and dying can create a process and experience that is filled with beauty, healing, and peace.
It is difficult to talk about death and dying because nobody knows exactly what to expect. However, when we do talk about it, we can create more control of the process and have a better experience, filled with love and meaning, feeling less fearful and more connected.
Your precious time may be the most meaningful time of your life.
Let's Understand Palliative Care
Patients often don't fully understand Palliative Care and how helpful it can be during their illness journey:
- It is not hospice care per se, and is ideally introduced and discussed at the time of any diagnosis with the potential of any form of suffering.
- It does not mean giving up or that your life is over.
- It is a branch of medicine focused on people who may or may not be receiving curative treatments. You do not need to be close to death to receive effective palliative care.
- It aims at enhancing quality of life for patient and family, through symptom and pain management.
- It is also the type of care used in hospice, when the life expectancy of a patient is less than six months and the choice has been made to focus on comfort and quality of life.
My services
I am a non-medical palliative caregiver. I come to your home, the hospital or your home-away-from-home for compassionate conversation about your situation or that of your loved one. We can also work by phone and/or video-connection if we live far apart.
I can help you understand where you are in your process, what is happening and what you may expect. I can help you feel less helpless, and show you how you can fill your days with value and meaning.
We can determine together what is important in the time to come, what resources are available and how I can be helpful in any way with my time and presence. This can vary from sorting out arrangements to sitting vigil when the time comes. Caregivers may need some "time off" when I can be there. I can sit with you, talk with you, or read with you.
I will meet you where you are, respecting your values, your wishes, and your priorities, always safeguarding your dignity.
You are so much more than your medical situation. We will make YOU and the quality of your days the center of attention.
About me
My name is Marieke (Mah-ree-kah) van Donkersgoed.
I am a Dutch native living in Washburn Wisconsin.
My interest to become a professional palliative caregiver was born during the journey with my mother in 2012. She was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer at age 83.
It was my first experience witnessing the process of serious illness from the initial diagnosis, to her death.
I was made painfully aware of both my lack of knowledge and the lack of helpful information available to me to be a good advocate and carer for my mom, and to keep myself on board with the process without completely losing my sanity and my courage.
Mom and I figured it out together.
Sometimes we stumbled but overall it was an eye- and heart-opening, invaluable experience. After a four-and-a-half month journey Mom died peacefully. She was never alone, and she never suffered.
When she passed I knew I had found my purpose in helping others on this journey.
Relevant Credentials
2010 - NLP Life Coaching
Bennett/Stellar University, Washington
2010 - Timeline Coach & Trauma Release Specialist
Bennett/Stellar University, Washington
2012 - Certified End-of-Life Doula
Quality of Life CareDoula Institute
2015 - Grief Integration Studies with Alan Wolfelt
2016 - Grief Integration Studies with Grief Recovery Institute
2023 - Certified Death Doula
IAP Career College
HIPAA Certified with ProTrainings
Founder/Owner of the Cypress Center for end life and grief resources, a Dementia Friendly Organization
Member NEDA - National End-of-Life Doula Alliance
Member DDNI - Death Doula Network International